#fowl

Card five hundred and thirty-four," repeated Artemis. "Of a series of six hundred standard inkblot cards. I memorized them during our sessions. You don't even shuffle." Argon checked the number on the back of the card: 534. Of course. "Knowing the number doesn't answer the question. What do you see?" Artemis allowed his lip to wobble. "I see an ax dripping with blood. Also a scared child, and an elf clothed in the skin of a troll." "Really?" Argon was interested now. "No. Not really. I see a secure building, perhaps a family home, with four windows. A trustworthy pet, and a pathway leading from the door into the distance. I think, if you check your manual, you will find that these answers fall inside healthy parameters." Argon did not need to check. The Mud Boy was right, as usual. ↗

— Eoin Colfer

#humor #family

It's despair at the lack of feeling, of love, of reason in the world. It's despair that anyone can even contemplate the idea of dropping a bomb or ordering that it should be dropped. It's despair that so few of us care. It's despair that there's so much brutality and callousness in the world. It's despair that perfectly normal young men can be made vicious and evil because they've won a lot of money. And then do what you've done to me. ↗

— John Fowles

#despair #john-fowles #love #obsession #the-collector

Play along, the wink said. I'll get you out of this. At least Artemis hoped this was what his wink communicated and not something like 'Any chance of another kiss later? ↗

— Eoin Colfer

#humor #communication

Me," Artemis blurted. "I'm the nut." Artemis could have sworn the squid winked at him before bringing the five-ton chunk of spacecraft swinging down toward the morsel of meat in its blue shell. "I'm the nut!" Artemis shouted again, a little hysterically, it must be said. ↗

— Eoin Colfer

#humor #nut #squid #humor

Nobody's death is impending." ..."Well technically everyone's death is impending. ↗

— Eoin Colfer

#humor #death

Friendship isn't a science mudboy. Just do what you think is right. ↗

— Eoin Colfer

#eoin-colfer #friendship #holly-short #inspirational #friendship

i love reading because it is fun ↗

— Elle Fowler

#love

You know, Miss Holly, you look very dramatic like that, backlit by the fire. Very attractive, if I may say so. I know you shared a moment passionne with Artemis which he subsequently fouled up with his typical boorish behavior. Let me just throw something out there for you to consider while we're chasing the probe: I share Artemis's passion but not his boorishness. No pressure; just think about it. This was enough to elicit a deafening moment of silence even in the middle of a crisis, which Orion seemed to be blissfully unaffected by. ↗

— Eoin Colfer

#flirting #humor #love #orion #humor

It's despair that so few of us care. It's despair that there's so much brutality and callousness in the world. It's despair that perfectly normal young men can be made vicious and evil because they've won a lot of money. And then do what you've done to me. ↗

— John Fowles

#the-collector #men

Remember the pain?' thought Artemis. I hate myself. I really do. ↗

— Eoin Colfer

#paradox