#cookie

There's a cough behind me, and I find Cheeseburger staring anxiously at my box. I glare at Amanda, the Arm-Toucher, and pull out an entire sleeve of Thin Mints. "Here you go, Cheeseburger." He looks at me in surprise, but then again, that's how he always looks. "Wow. Thanks Anna." Cheeseburger takes the cookies and lumbers toward the stairwell. Josh is horrified. "Whyareyougivingawaythecookies? ↗

— Stephanie Perkins

#french

This is like a cookie, it tastes like a cookie having sex with a doughnut. ↗

— Daniel Handler

#cookies #humor #humor

So you have your price. Your soul for a cookie. ↗

— James Patterson

#funny #humor #funny

Like special fungus, your love will grow in strange places ↗

— Lauren Bjorkman

#love

Remember, sex is like a Chinese dinner. It ain't over 'til you both get your cookie. ↗

— Alec Baldwin

#chinese #cookie #dinner #get #like

I'm so glad I'm not a dentist. How many times does someone say, 'Oh, Doc, it felt so good when you were drilling my teeth'? Never. But when you give someone a wonderful cookie, you put a little of yourself in, and you see someone's face light up - that's immediate approval. ↗

— Paula Deen

#cookie #dentist #does #drilling #face

I ate everything - a lot of pizza, bags of chips and boxes of cookies. Now I love chicken, that's all I eat. ↗

— Robert Iler

#bags #boxes #chicken #chips #cookies

There is a peculiar burning odor in the room, like explosives. the kitchen fills with smoke and the hot, sweet, ashy smell of scorched cookies. The war has begun. ↗

— Alison Lurie

#burning #cookies #explosives #fills #hot

Charley talking to Cookie ‘'You know those women in nursing homes that have to be restrained around the clock because they mix up everyones medication and steal all the bedpans?'' ‘’Yes'' I said wondering what I was walking into ''That’s going to be you!'' She was probably right, if I live that long ↗

— Darynda Jones

#cookie #homour #home

whyareyougivingawaythecookies?! ↗

— Stephanie Perkins

#humor #josh #humor