#comical

Assumptions are unopened windows that foolish birds fly into, and their broken bodies are evidence gathered too late. ↗

— Bryan Davis

#blunt #comical #funny #harsh #irony

-"He loved her...It was noble of him. It was beautiful." -"It was stupid. ↗

— Lloyd Alexander

#comedy #comical #funny #humor #humorous

Girls are always complaining that they can never meet a nice guy. Nice guys are everywhere. The problem isn’t that there aren't any nice guys, the problem is that all of the nice guys are ugly. ↗

— Carroll Bryant

#funny-as-hell #funny-but-sad #funny-but-true #funny-humor #hilarious

One should never give up on hope. Unless that's the name of the girl who cheated on you in which case, yeah, give her up. ↗

— Carroll Bryant

#comedy-humor #comical #funny #funny-humor #humor

All I wanted for Christmas was a New Years Eve party that I would never forget. Too bad I got too drunk to remember it. ↗

— Carroll Bryant

#funny #funny-humor #humor #humorous #funny

What goes up must come down. Which is why we invented Viagra, to make it stay up a little longer. ↗

— Carroll Bryant

#funny #humor #humorous #humorous-quote #funny

Stark raving mad. ↗

— Stieg Larsson

#inspirational #inspirational

I cannot, I cannot,' cried Marianne; 'leave me, leave me, if I distress you; leave me, hate me, forget me! But do not torture me so. Oh! how easy for those who have no sorrow of their own to talk of extertion! ↗

— Jane Austen

#comical #distress #love #torture #anger

We made it back to the airport without getting mugged, stoned, shot at, pounced on, bombed, shelled, garroted, gassed, pitched into, caught in a cross fire, sniped at, blockaded, napalmed, or trip-wired. No one even hit us with a water balloon. ↗

— Daniel Quinn

#funny #humor #ishmael #funny

The look Anthony shot at his sister was so comically malevolent Simon nearly laughed. He managed to restrain himself, but mostly just because he was fairly certain that any show of humor would cause Anthony's fist to lose its battle with his brain, with Simon's face emerging as the conflict's primary casualty. ↗

— Julia Quinn

#humor