#ck

But had I accepted the pickle juice, I would be drinking pickle juice right now. ↗

— Nicki Minaj

#inspirational #music #nickiminaj #humor

The pants come down. Most look shamefaced, but tha Arthur McBride is not the least bit shy about showing off his equipment, oh no, he isn't. He grins in my direction. 'Not all that impressive, boyo ↗

— L.A. Meyer

#humor #humor

When she got back from taking Cassie to school Fancy knew that she ought to be working on her wilderness romance. She had promised thirty thousand words to her editor by tomorrow, and she had only written eleven. Specifically: His rhinoceros smelled like a poppadom: sweaty, salty, strange and strong. Her editor would cut that line. ↗

— Jaclyn Moriarty

#humor #romance-novel #writers #writers-block #humor

My sense of teasing is completely lost on you.", Patrick said, hoisting himself back up. "It's a shame too. Most people tell me my sense of humor is my best quality, only outdone by my otherworldly good looks. ↗

— Nicole Williams

#patrick #humor

Don't live with writers. Writers are bastards. ↗

— Warren Ellis

#humor

Didn't anyone tell you that size doesn't matter?" "Yes, but I told him to put his pants back on and go home. ↗

— Christine Warren

#humorous #humor

You’re like seven feet tall, aren’t you?” “I am not seven feet tall,” he snapped at her as if she’d really insulted him. “I’m six-eleven.” When she smirked in disbelief, he added, “And three-quarters. ↗

— Shelly Laurenston

#humor #lock #humor

From this moment on I'd dedicate my life to rock and roll and take as many drugs as possible. What could possibly go wrong? ↗

— Craig Ferguson

#humor #rock-and-roll #humor

Fortunately, he'd found that most people were easy to locate at five thirty in the morning. . ↗

— Patricia Briggs

#charles-cornick #cry-wolf #humor #morning #wake-up

You're a fine fastidious young man, as proud as a lion, as gentle as a girl. You'd make a good catch for the devil. ↗

— Honoré de Balzac

#coolness #eloquence #humor #swagger #humor