#cheapness

For as long as I can remember, my father saved. He saves money, he saves disfigured sticks that resemble disfigured celebrities, and most of all, he saves food. Cherry tomatoes, sausage biscuits, the olives plucked from other people's martinis --he hides these things in strange places until they are rotten. And then he eats them. ↗

— David Sedaris

#family #food #packrat #strangeness #family

After awhile you realize that putting your actions where your mouth is makes you less likely to have to put your money where your mouth is. ↗

— Criss Jami

#actions-over-words #boasting #bragging #cheap #cheapness

Isn't Glen an accountant? We're all frugal." These days, by necessity. "You might be frugal, but Glen is cheap. For Valentine's Day, he actually suggested that we go to a card shop, exchange cards in the aisle, then put them back because he didn't see the use in spending the money!" "Okay, that's cheap." Libby huffed. "I swear, if he cuts up my Bloomingdale's card, I'll cut off his pecker. ↗

— Stephanie Bond

#frugal #funny #funny

[Over breakfast] We discussed the 'novelisation' question. This is where the studio pay someone to novelise my script and sell it as Sense and Sensibility. I've said if this happens I will hang myself. Revolting notion. Beyond revolting. Lindsay [Doran] said that the executive she had discussed it with had said 'as a human being I agree with you -- but ...' I laughed until my porridge was cool enough to swallow. ↗

— Emma Thompson

#marketing #movies #novelization #screenplays #unintentional-humor