#blanket

Long hair is a security blanket for me. I cut it short a few years ago and I really never want to do that again. When I do cut it, I cut it myself. ↗

— Alanis Morissette

#ago #blanket #cut #few #hair

America is not a blanket woven from one thread, one color, one cloth. ↗

— Jesse Jackson

#blanket #cloth #color #thread #woven

I think the Supreme Court does have the authority, which is not used, to declare a blanket right for all people, all adults. ↗

— Jack Kevorkian

#blanket #court #declare #does #i

A brick could be surgically inserted in the chest of a man who needs a heart transplant. And for just $20,000 more dollars, that brick could be replaced with a new heart.
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— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket #funny #humor #random #strange

Love is like a blanket: it will keep you warm, but it might also suffocate you. Also, it's probably covered with cat hair--love, I mean. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#cat-hair #cats #love #suffocation #love

A brick could be used to raise your status as an upstanding citizen. Don’t get too excited, though. It’ll only raise you up about three inches.
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— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

A brick could be used to represent society as a whole. But to represent society as a half, I’d recommend using either a full carton of half and half, or a half-full carton of whole milk.
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— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

A blanket would be a great surface to print my new book on, so you could read it in bed while you’re having boring, obligatory sex with your spouse, who’s as dry and exciting as a sack of flour. 
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#books #boring #brick-and-blanket #funny #humor

A brick could be used to represent my hero. My hero obviously doesn’t look like a brick, but since he is my hero I decided to represent him as more handsome and interesting than he really is. Who’s my hero? Any member of Congress. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #divergence-test #iq-test

A blanket could be used as a tarp over one of those tiny circular inflatable pools for children. Well, you might call it a tarp, but I’d call it a trap. But I’ve already tried everything I can think of to silence the noisy neighbor kids, from mousetraps on lollipop sticks, to superglue disguised as lip gloss—and yet the shrieking continues.
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— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket #funny #humor #random #strange