#bastard

You are your mother's trueborn son of Lannister." "Am I?" the dwarf replied, sardonic. "Do tell my lord father. My mother died birthing me, and he's never been sure." "I don't even know who my mother was," Jon said. "Some woman, no doubt. Most of them are." He favored Jon with a rueful grin. "Remember this, boy. All dwarfs may be bastards, yet not all bastards need be dwarfs." And with that he turned and sauntered back into the feast, whistling a tune. When he opened the door, the light from within threw his shadow clear across the yard, and for just a moment Tyrion Lannister stood tall as a king. ↗

— George R.R. Martin

#dwarfs #humor #jon-snow #king #sarcasm

I moved further and further away from mass entertainment. The sexual element became increasingly sinister and bizarre. Don't blame me! The bastards drove me to it! They all backed off after that! ↗

— Robert Crumb

#away #backed #bastards #became #bizarre

America is at that awkward stage; it's too late to work within the system, but too early to shoot the bastards. ↗

— Claire Wolfe

#awkward #bastards #early #late #shoot

I don't mind playing absolute bastards... I just don't want to play the grouch. ↗

— Hume Cronyn

#bastards #grouch #i #just #mind

I decided there and then to sue the bastards. ↗

— Barry Sheene

#decided #i #sue #then #there and then

Being illegitimate is a technicality. It does not mean that there is anything wrong with you. Men use "bastard" as a curse. But to use the term thus is to show that they themselves are less than a proper human being. ↗

— Theresa Breslin

#children #leonardo-da-vinci #matteo #value-of-life #life

I've got kids that enjoy stealing. I've got kids that don't think about stealing one way or the other, and I've got kids that just tolerate stealing because they know they've got nothing else to do. But nobody--and I mean nobody--has ever been hungry for it like this boy. If he had a bloody gash across his throat and a physiker was trying to sew it up, Lamora would steal the needle and thread and die laughing. He...steals too much. ↗

— Scott Lynch

#locke-lamora #stealing #thieves #tolerance

In another Christmas story, Dale Pearson, evil developer, self-absorbed woman hater, and seemingly unredeemable curmudgeon, might be visited in the night by a series of ghosts who, by showing him bleak visions of Christmas future, past, and present, would bring about in him a change to generosity, kindness, and a general warmth toward his fellow man. But this is not that kind of Christmas story, so here, in not too many pages, someone is going to dispatch the miserable son of a bitch with a shovel. That's the spirit of Christmas yet to come in these parts. Ho, ho, ho. ↗

— Christopher Moore

#christmas #humor #murder #change

Why is it that right-wing bastards always stand shoulder to shoulder in solidarity, while liberals fall out among themselves? ↗

— Yevgeny Yevtushenko

#among #bastards #fall #liberals #out

I didn't want to miss out on a chance to congratulate you on your bouncing baby boy.” Garrett’s eyes trailed over to Milo who stood tall with an arrogant smile on his face next to his father. “I’m not sure on the protocol over here, though, is it customary to celebrate bastards?” Garrett’s comment hit the mark just like he knew it would. The smile was wiped from Milo’s face, and he stalked right up to Garrett and threw a punch at his jaw. ↗

— T.E. Sivec

#bastard #burn #garrett #haha #lol