#bar

Once when I had remarked on the affection quite often found between cat and dog, my friend replied, "Yes. But I bet no dog would ever confess it to the other dogs. ↗

— C.S. Lewis

#dogs #embarrassment #friendship #friendship

Funny that. We live in islands of Hours and we never seem to have time enough for anything... ↗

— Clive Barker

#absolute-midnight #clive-barker #time #wasted-time #funny

It's funny. Maria Elena and I, we are meant for each other and not meant for each other, it's a contradiction. ↗

— Woody Allen

#christina #vicky #funny

So my one kid's 4, my other kid's 4 months, I'm 44, Barack Obama is the 44th president - it's all lining up nicely here. ↗

— Eddie Vedder

#barack obama #here #i #kid #lining

The hand on my hair moved to my back, and I realized someone was singing softly. The voice was familiar, and something about it made my chest ache. Well, that was to be expected. Angels' songs would be awfully poignant. "'I was working as a waitress in a cocktail bar, when I met you...'" the voice crooned. I frowned. Was that really an appropriate song for the Heavenly Host to be-- ↗

— Rachel Hawkins

#cocktail-bar #grace #hex-hall #humor #mom

I staggered into a Manchester bar late one night on a tour and the waitress said "You look as if you need a Screaming Orgasm". At the time this was the last thing on my mind... ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#cocktails #drinks #humor #sex #humor

You wanna know how to make God laugh?" he said. "Tell him your plans." (God-shaped Hole) ↗

— Tiffany Debartolo

#tiffany-debartolo #humor

It is Nixon himself who represents that dark, venal and incurably violent side of the American character that almost every country in the world has learned to fear and despise. Our Barbie-doll president, with his Barbie-doll wife and his boxful of Barbie-doll children is also America's answer to the monstrous Mr. Hyde. He speaks for the Werewolf in us; the bully, the predatory shyster who turns into something unspeakable, full of claws and bleeding string-warts on nights when the moon comes to close… ↗

— Hunter S. Thompson

#humor #politics #vicious #humor

It is disappointing and embarrassing to the science profession that some Nobel Laureates would deliberately use their well deserved scientific reputations and hold themselves out as experts in other fields. ↗

— David Douglass

#deserved #disappointing #embarrassing #experts #fields

The moment you doubt whether you can fly, you cease for ever to be able to do it. ↗

— J.M. Barrie

#belief #fantasy #flying #imagination #kensington-gardens