#banana

My friend asked me if I wanted a frozen banana. I said 'No, but I want a regular banana later, so... yeah.' ↗

— Mitch Hedberg

#banana #friend #frozen #i #later

I want to see an elephant hunt down a man for the sole purpose of collecting his teeth, while a chorus of typewriters sings songs that praises the bananas for their wisdom, leadership, and their high levels of potassium. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#bizarre #dada #funny #humor #hunt

Never interrupt me when I'm eating a banana. ↗

— Ryan Stiles

#eating #i #interrupt #me #never

If I'm playing in the morning, I'll get some carbs early: porridge with chopped banana. If I'm playing in the afternoon, I'll start with less carbs and have some eggs and fruit for breakfast, then a light lunch about 90 minutes before I play, so I don't feel sluggish or full. ↗

— Rory McIlroy

#about #afternoon #banana #before #breakfast

I think Chris Rock at the Oscars was a great example. I thought that was intellectually hilarious. The Gap starts a war with Banana Republic... That to me was funny. ↗

— Christopher Meloni

#chris #chris rock #example #funny #gap

Democrats always like to brag that their guys are smarter than the opponents and Republicans always like to brag that their guys are more moral than the opponents. But if you're looking for morals in politics you're looking for bananas in the cheese department. ↗

— Harry Shearer

#bananas #brag #cheese #democrats #department

This is what it means to be loved... when someone wants to touch you, to be tender... ↗

— Banana Yoshimoto

#love #tenderness #the-lake #touch #love

Silas consumed only one food, and it was not bananas. ↗

— Neil Gaiman

#blood #book #fantasy #food #funny

The adjective is the banana peel of the parts of speech. ↗

— Clifton Paul Fadiman

#banana #parts #peel #speech