#awesome

Go to Venice. Find Scorpia. And you will find your destiny. ↗

— Anthony Horowitz

#awesome

Look, I asked you here for a reason. Much as I hate to admit it, vampire, we have something in common." "Totally awesome hair?" Simon suggested. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#quip #simon-lewis #awesome

TO:[email protected]: Something's wrong! The house is shaking! TO:[email protected]: Well can you turn down the volume on Star Trek:Voyager? I thought we were having an earthquake when the Enterprise hit Warp speed. Why did you let me sleep until nearly one? ↗

— Robert Bryndza

#email #funny #star-trek-warp-speed #funny

If I hung out with Van Gogh, I don’t know what we’d do. We’d just play it by ear, I guess.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#bizarre #funny #humor #random #random-thought

When I grow up, I'd like to be dangerous. ↗

— Kirsten Miller

#humor #humor

Mr. Pot drank ten pots of coffee, even though I only made eight. That’s a savings of 20%!
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#bizarre #coffee #funny #humor #random

I managed to beat Michael Phelps’ 400 meter IM time. And not only did I beat his time, but I did it in exactly 200 meters.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#bizarre #compete #competition #competitive #delusional

Voting for the lesser of two evils is still voting for evil. Next time, why don’t you go all out and write in Lucifer on the ballot?
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#bizarre #funny #humor #politicians #politics

Miles was still mourning the loss of his Romantic Plan. 'There was going to be champagne, and oysters, and you' -- he held out both hands as though shifting a piece of furniture -- 'were going to be sitting there, and I was going to get down on one knee, and...and... ↗

— Lauren Willig

#miles-is-awesome #relationships #romance #love

Sh!t. F_ck sh!t.'.... 'Sh!t f_ck would have also been accepted. ↗

— Ilona Andrews

#humorous #humor