#awesome

I’ve got a pocket full of cash, and a condom full of erection.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#bizarre #funny #humor #random #random-thought

A karate black belt would make a great blindfold on a kidnap victim, after you karate chop them into submission.
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— Jarod Kintz

#bizarre #blindfold #funny #humor #karate

I am better then most people in life. -Rustin Hieber ↗

— Ryan Higa

#humor #justin-bieber #nigahiga #random-quote #ryan-higa

Yelling doesn't get your point across, it only makes it louder. ↗

— Grant Hill

#common-sense #humor #humor

It costs me never a stab nor squirm / To tread by chance upon a worm. / Aha, my little dear, / I say, Your clan will pay me back one day. ↗

— Dorothy Parker

#humor #poetry #humor

Life is a wild ride, but that's how we learn about boys. ↗

— Awesome Babe

#love #shayla #life

For just a little while, in all our lives, we're granted brief glimpses at the way things really operate. In those times, we learn the hardest lessons. To coin a few phrases, there are none so blind as those who will not see... and sometimes, the sweetest kittens have the sharpest claws. ↗

— Edward Morris

#awesomeness #inspirational #inspirational

He put the book down. “As you wish.” He rose and walked past me. I lowered my sword, expecting him to pass, but suddenly he stepped in dangerously close. “Welcome home. I’m glad you made it. There is coffee in the kitchen for you.” My mouth gaped open. He inhaled my scent, bent close, about to kiss me… I just stood there like an idiot. Curran smirked and whispered in my ear instead. “Psych.” And just like that, he was out the door and gone. Oh boy. ↗

— Ilona Andrews

#curran #flirting #kate #princess-bride #awesome

Alice Malloy had dark, stringy hair, and even her husband, who loved her more than he knew, was sometimes reminded by her lean face of a tenement doorway on a rainy day, for her countenance was long, vacant, and weakly lighted, a passage for the gentle transports and miseries of the poor. ↗

— John Cheever

#love

As Aristotle said, 'Excellence is a habit.' I would say furthermore that excellence is made constant through the feeling that comes right after one has completed a work which he himself finds undeniably awe-inspiring. He only wants to relax until he's ready to renew such a feeling all over again because to him, all else has become absolutely trivial. ↗

— Criss Jami

#aristotle #awesomeness #consistency #excellence #habit