#awesome

Life is short, have dessert first. ↗

— Joan Smith

#life

Only you can take inner freedom away from yourself, or give it to yourself. Nobody else can. ↗

— Michael A. Singer

#inspirational-life #inspirational-quotes #quotes-to-define-my-life #quotes-to-live-by #self-awareness

I don’t worry about identity theft, because I don’t even know who I am as a person. So if I’m not even in possession of my own identity, how can it be stolen from me?
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#bizarre #funny #humor #random #random-thought

There may be a sucker born every minute, but every 30 seconds a lollipop pops out.
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— Jarod Kintz

#bizarre #funny #humor #random #random-thought

She asked if I found what she was telling me very exciting, and I managed to yelp out “very” while yawning.
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— Jarod Kintz

#bizarre #funny #humor #random #random-thought

I always wear gloves, so at any moment I could commit a crime and not be worried about fingerprints. Plus, it saves on buying hand sanitizer.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#bizarre #funny #humor #random #random-thought

Of all the things I own, I’m most sentimental about my shoes, because they’ve traveled with me every step of my journey.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#bizarre #funny #humor #random #random-thought

I don't know why people like the home run so much. A home run is over as soon as it starts.... The triple is the most exciting play of the game. A triple is like meeting a woman who excites you, spending the evening talking and getting more excited, then taking her home. It drags on and on. You're never sure how it's going to turn out. ↗

— George Foster

#home

Leave the fireworks for those who cast no spark of their own. ↗

— Karen Abbott

#chicago #inspirational #whores #inspirational

Sometimes the clouds weren’t weightless. Sometimes their bellies got dark and full. It was life. It happened. It didn’t mean it wasn’t scary, or that I wasn’t still afraid, but now I knew that as long as I was standing under it with Braden beside me when those clouds broke, I’d be alright. ↗

— Samantha Young

#contemporary-romance #hot #lovely #sweet #life