#amp

Fortunately, among werewolf women, the word "bitch" is not offensive. I was having a lot of fun with that. "Hey there, bitches!" I called as I came through the door. "What are my favorite bitches up to today? ↗

— Molly Harper

#bitches #humor #vampires #werewolf #werewolves

Just remember, girls: The young male vampire is a predator by nature. Some boys may look at you not only as a romantic interest, but as prey... ↗

— Beth Fantaskey

#dating

Mom, camping is not a date; it's an endurance test. If you can survive camping with someone, you should marry them on the way home. ↗

— Yvonne Prinz

#funny #marriage #dating

You bit me on the neck? What kind of a sorry-ass vampire wannabe are you, anyhow?” I grabbed for my dirt-covered purse that lay by my feet. I kept a can of pepper spray in it for protection, or at least I used to. Did I still have it? Did those things have an expiration date? Didn’t matter. If I had to, I’d just use it to bash him over the head. I’m not a wannabe.” He actually had the audacity to look insulted. “I am a vampire.” Psycho, I thought. Total psycho. ↗

— Michelle Rowen

#vampire #dating

Stupid Romanian bloodsucker. He was lucky I hadn't bestowed another exalted scar on his imperial body. ↗

— Beth Fantaskey

#funny #vampire #dating

Valkyrie made a face. "Bloody vampires." Ryan sat forward. "That was a vampire? That guy who looked like an accountant?" "We don't talk about vampires," Skulduggery warned. "But it was daytime. How could he have been out during the-" "We don't talk about vampires!" Valkyrie said sharply. Ryan shrunk back. "Sorry," he said. "Don't worry about it," Skulduggery told him. "Valkyrie used to date a vampire that's all." "We didn't date ," Valkyrie said immediately. Skulduggery held a hand up. "I'm not judging." Valkyrie scowled. ↗

— Derek Landy

#ryan #skulduggery-pleasant #valkyrie-cain #vampires #dating

Yes you can let a guy bite you but not on the first date! he has to pay for dinner ! But you can bite him on the first date at no cost that is quite normal ↗

— Amy Mah

#blood #humor #teenagers #vampire #vampires

No one else could know we were going on a date, though. I needed to protect Edwart in case anything happened. Still, I had never gone out with such a hot guy before, so I sent a vague e-mail to the whole grade saying, “Edwart Mullen and Belle Goose Are Totally Together. ↗

— Harvard Lampoon

#nightlight #parody #twilight #dating

I got to get the right people in the right job. Because a lot of costs can be taken out in the context of your administration without the legislature.For example, using technology to do more with less. Using technology to fight fraud. Reorganizing and streamlining can be done within the context of the administration. ↗

— Meg Whitman

#because #context #costs #done #example

Buffy Anne Summers 1981-2001 Beloved sister Devoted Friend She saved the world A lot ↗

— Joss Whedon

#death #epitaph #humour #death