#all

It may help to understand human affairs to be clear that most of the great triumphs and tragedies of history are caused, not by people being fundamentally good or fundamentally bad, but by people being fundamentally people. ↗

— Neil Gaiman

#humor #humor

You look lousy,' he said. Jace blinked. 'Seems an odd time to start an insult contest, but if you insist, I could probably think up something good.' 'No I mean it. You don't look good.' 'This is from a guy ho has all the sex appeal of a penguin. Look, I realize you may be jealous that the good Lord didn't deal you the same chiseled hand he dealt me, but that's no reason to-' 'I am not trying to insult you.' Simon snapped. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#humor #insults #jace-lightwood #simon-lewis #humor

If Jesus came back and saw what was being done in his name, he'd never stop throwing up. ↗

— Woody Allen

#humor #organized-religion #religion #woody-allen #humor

There is nothing in the universe that I fear, but that I shall not know all my duty, or shall fail to do it. ↗

— Mary Lyon

#fail #fear #i #know #nothing

You necessarily have to be lost, before you’re found. ↗

— T. Scott McLeod

#buddhism #dark-night-of-the-soul #enlightenment #love #meditation

She’s not showing any interest in me and she looks like she doesn’t want to be here. Should I take off her handcuffs? I thought kidnap victims were supposed to fall in love with their captors?
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#fall-in-love #handcuffs #interest #kidnap #kidnapped

We who think we are about to die will laugh at anything. ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#gallows-humor #humor #laughing #death

It means that two people start loving each other. I guess because it can feel really sudden and because it's powerful. Like gravity--an unstoppable force. ↗

— Heather Anastasiu

#fall-in-love #falling-in-love #in-love #love #love

I never thought Greek philosophy could make a damn bit of sense to me. And most of it didn't, but those words just seemed right. 'Love is composed of a single soul, inhabiting two bodies.'" He took her by the shoulders drawing her close. "It rang true for me, in a way nothing else did. Whatever soul I had, Katie, I think I placed it in your keeping twenty years ago. And now, it's as if...every time we kiss, you give a little piece of it back. ↗

— Tessa Dare

#love

Dude. Post-apocalyptic world. Who does job applications anymore?” “I do.” I squint at it, then him. “What are you paying me?” I angle. “Dude. Post-apocalyptic world. Who does money anymore.” I snicker. First sign of any sense of humor he’s shown. Then I remember where I am and why. I wad it up and throw it at him. It bounces off his chest. ↗

— Karen Marie Moning

#ryodan #humor