#air

I seem to be allergic to whatever that terrible smell is," said Gateman when the urge to sneeze had finally subsided. "What terrible smell?" "The air," said Gateman. "It smells...different." "That's called oxygen," said Professor Boxley. "Freh air. No cars, no buses, no factories; just pure, clean oxygen. ↗

— Cuthbert Soup

#allergy #funny #oxygen #sneeze #funny

In one of his darker moments, the irony started him laughing and he couldn't stop, and the sounds that came from him, before finally tapering into sobs, were so far from mirth they might have been the forced inversion of laughter-like a soul pulled inside out to reveal its rawest meats. ↗

— Laini Taylor

#beautiful-description #despair #emotions #karou #beauty

You and I were never meant to be together, but we are. Our pairing is not unlike two electrons ignoring natural laws in order to orbit one another. Life now defies reason—quirky but beautiful. ↗

— Richelle E. Goodrich

#love #pairing #relationship #richelle #richelle-goodrich

You humans, always eating. I'll make you soup. You can eat it while you keep working." Myrnin set aside his book and walked into the back of the lab. "Don't use the same beaker you used for poisons!" Claire yelled after him. He waved a pale hand. "I mean it! ↗

— Rachel Caine

#funny #ghost-town #humor #myrnin #rachel-caine

Myrnin, who hadn't said much, suddenly reached out and wrapped his arms around her. She stiffened, shocked, and for a panicked second wondered whether he'd suddenly decided to snack on her neck... but it was just a hug. His body felt cold against hers, and way too close, but then he let go and stepped back. "You've done very well. I'm extremely proud of you," he said. There was a touch of color high in his pale cheeks. "Do go home now. And shower. You reek like the dead." Which, coming from a vampire, was pretty rich. ↗

— Rachel Caine

#funny #ghost-town #humor #morganville-vampires #myrnin

When you are on the air, there is no land you need to call home. ↗

— Grigoris Deoudis

#call #home #land #home

You okay?" "Fine." "Your heart's beating really fast." "Gee, thanks. That's very comforting that you can hear it." He smiled, and it was the old Michael, the one she'd first met before all the vamp stuff. "Yeah, I know it is. Sorry. Just stay behind me if there's trouble." "You sound like Shane." "Well, he did say he'd kill me if I got you hurt. I'm just looking after my own neck." "Liar. ↗

— Rachel Caine

#eve-rosser #funny #ghost-town #humor #michael-glass

This was not a fairy-tale castle and there was no such thing as a fairy-tale ending, but sometimes you could threaten to kick the handsome prince in the ham-and-eggs. ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#happy-end #humor #humor

I want certain conversations to come equipped with antilock brakes, especially if I'm talking to a real airbag. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#airheads #conversations #enlightenment #humor #humor

All that we know, soon shall we abandon. As time will lend itself. Eyes know only what they see. But brave hearts beat on with belief. ↗

— Nathalie M. Leblanc

#fairies-faeries #fantasy #magic #young-adult-fiction #young-adult-fiction