#age

Other cars resent me because I’m the best driver on the road, but I won’t have to put up with their honks much longer – soon my swing will be good enough for the golf course. ↗

— Bauvard

#golf #humor #road-rage #funny

I'd like to thank William the conqueror for the Normandy Conquest. Because of him I've been speaking French every time I say the pledge of allegiance on D-day. ↗

— Bauvard

#humor #language #normandy #funny

When a court officer suggested quarantine for Nerissa, she grabbed the man's pen and jammed it into the back of his hand, screaming that he was a Crimson Guard witch come to remove her memories and replace them with bird-song. They decided to skip quarantine after that. ↗

— Caitlin Kittredge

#lovely-way-with-words #mental-image #funny

The payment made by a manufacturer to a patentee for the privilege of using the patent process, is usually termed, in commercial language, a rent; and under the same head must be ranked all extraordinary qualities of body and mind. ↗

— Nassau William Senior

#commercial #extraordinary #head #language #made

As, however, the port in reality lies in thirty-two degrees thirty-four minutes, according to the observations that have been made, they went much beyond it, thus making the voyage much longer than was necessary. ↗

— Junipero Serra

#been #beyond #degrees #however #lies

With languages, you are at home anywhere. ↗

— Edward De Waal

#languages #travel #home

The President also talked at length about how well the American economy is doing. Apparently, he got his information on this topic from his millionaire supporters. For the average working family, these are trying economic times. ↗

— Jose Serrano

#also #american #american economy #apparently #average

Thankfully, persistence is a great substitute for talent. ↗

— Steve Martin

#encouragement #humor #steve-martin #humor

We live, all of us, in sprung rhythm. Even in cities, folk stir without knowing it to the surge in the blood that is the surge and urgency of season. In being born, we have taken seisin of the natural world, and as ever, it is the land which owns us, not we, the land. Even in the countryside, we dwell suspended between the rhythms of earth and season, weather and sky, and those imposed by metropolitan clocks, at home and abroad. When does the year begin? No; ask rather, When does it not? For us – all of us – as much as for Mr Eliot, midwinter spring is its own season; for all of us, if we but see it, our world is as full of time-coulisses as was Thomas Mann’s. Countrymen know this, with the instinct they share with their beasts. Writers want to know it also, and to articulate what the countryman knows and cannot, perhaps, express to those who sense but do not know, immured in sad conurbations, rootless amidst Betjeman’s frightful vision of soot and stone, worker’s flats and communal canteens, where it is the boast of pride that a man doesn’t let the grass grow under his feet. As both countryman and writer, I have a curious relationship to time. ↗

— G.M.W. Wemyss

#country-life #countryside #sir-john-betjeman #time #village-life

About their wedding on a beach of Nantucket, after nearly 50 years together as a couple: "After years of being who we truly were only in the privacy of our homes or with a few friends, we were out in the world, under the sky, no longer pretending.” - Norman Sunshine, co-author, Double Life ↗

— Norman Sunshine

#double-life #gay-marriage #love-story #norman-sunshine #home