W. C. Fields

The best cure for insomnia is to get a lot of sleep. ↗

— W. C. Fields

#cure #get #insomnia #lot #sleep

I am free of all prejudices. I hate every one equally. ↗

— W. C. Fields

#am #equally #every #free #hate

Ah, the patter of little feet around the house. There's nothing like having a midget for a butler. ↗

— W. C. Fields

#around #butler #feet #having #house

Hell, I never vote for anybody, I always vote against. ↗

— W. C. Fields

#against #always #anybody #hell #i

Sleep - the most beautiful experience in life - except drink. ↗

— W. C. Fields

#drink #except #experience #life #most

Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water. ↗

— W. C. Fields

#days #during #forced #i #live

Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite and furthermore always carry a small snake. ↗

— W. C. Fields

#carry #case #furthermore #small #snake

A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money. ↗

— W. C. Fields

#money #nothing #poor #poor man #rich

Don't worry about your heart, it will last you as long as you live. ↗

— W. C. Fields

#heart #last #live #long #will

Never try to impress a woman, because if you do she'll expect you to keep up the standard for the rest of your life. ↗

— W. C. Fields

#expect #impress #keep #life #never