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    Steven Wright

    Read through the most famous quotes from Steven Wright




    Support bacteria - they're the only culture some people have. ↗


    — Steven Wright

    #culture

    Shin: a device for finding furniture in the dark. ↗


    — Steven Wright

    #humor

    I have an inferiority complex, but it’s not a very good one. ↗


    — Steven Wright

    #recursion #humor

    Plan to be spontaneous tomorrow. ↗


    — Steven Wright

    #procrastination

    I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, 'Where’s the self-help section?' She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose. ↗


    — Steven Wright

    #self-improvement #humor

    Did you sleep well?" "No, I made a couple of mistakes. ↗


    — Steven Wright

    #humor

    I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory. ↗


    — Steven Wright

    #humor

    If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends? ↗


    — Steven Wright

    #absurd

    What happens if you get scared half to death twice? ↗


    — Steven Wright

    #scared #twice #death

    A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of widths. ↗


    — Steven Wright

    #afraid #heights #i #lot #me






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    Did you know about Steven Wright?

    Steven Alexander Wright (born December 6 1955) is an American comedian actor and writer. Filmography
    Desperately Seeking Susan (1985) as Larry Stillman D. What's disturbing is that with a few of these jokes I wish I had thought of them.

    He is known for his distinctly lethargic voice and slow deadpan delivery of ironic philosophical and sometimes nonsensical jokes paraprosdokians and one-liners with contrived situations.

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