Lenny Bruce

The only truly anonymous donor is the guy who knocks up your daughter. ↗

— Lenny Bruce

#daughter #donor #guy #knocks #only

I hate small towns because once you've seen the cannon in the park there's nothing else to do. ↗

— Lenny Bruce

#cannon #else #hate #i #nothing

If you can take the hot lead enema, then you can cast the first stone. ↗

— Lenny Bruce

#enema #first #hot #lead #stone

A lot of people say to me, 'Why did you kill Christ?' I dunno, it was one of those parties, got out of hand, you know. ↗

— Lenny Bruce

#did #dunno #got #hand #i

I won't say ours was a tough school, but we had our own coroner. We used to write essays like: What I'm going to be if I grow up. ↗

— Lenny Bruce

#essays #going #grow #grow up #had

I'll die young, but it's like kissing God. ↗

— Lenny Bruce

#god #i #kissing #like #young

Miami Beach is where neon goes to die. ↗

— Lenny Bruce

#beach #die #goes #miami #where

The role of a comedian is to make the audience laugh, at a minimum of once every fifteen seconds. ↗

— Lenny Bruce

#comedian #every #fifteen #laugh #make

The only honest art form is laughter, comedy. You can't fake it... try to fake three laughs in an hour - ha ha ha ha ha - they'll take you away, man. You can't. ↗

— Lenny Bruce

#art form #away #comedy #fake #form

The liberals can understand everything but people who don't understand them. ↗

— Lenny Bruce

#liberals #people #them #understand #who