Kinky Friedman

A happy childhood... is the worst possible preparation for life. ↗

— Kinky Friedman

#happy #happy childhood #life #possible #preparation

May the God of your choice bless and keep you. I respect Him as long as He does not circumcise me anymore. ↗

— Kinky Friedman

#bless #choice #does #god #him

Well, I just said that Jesus and I were both Jewish and that neither of us ever had a job, we never had a home, we never married and we traveled around the countryside irritating people. ↗

— Kinky Friedman

#both #countryside #ever #had #home

I never apologize for the truth. And the truth here is that racists come in many different colors. ↗

— Kinky Friedman

#colors #come #different #different colors #here

Money can buy you a fine dog, but only love can make him wag his tail. ↗

— Kinky Friedman

#buy #dog #fine #him #his

We've got to clear some of the room out of the prisons so we can put the bad guys in there, like the pedophiles and the politicians. ↗

— Kinky Friedman

#bad guys #clear #got #guys #like

I admit to drinking it, but I did not swallow. ↗

— Kinky Friedman

#did #drinking #i #swallow

I even went so far as to become a Southern Baptist for a while, until I realized that they didn't hold 'em under long enough. ↗

— Kinky Friedman

#become #enough #even #far #hold

Remember: Y'all is singular. All y'all is plural. All y'all's is plural possessive. ↗

— Kinky Friedman

#possessive #remember #singular

I admit I was drinking a Guinness... but I did not swallow. ↗

— Kinky Friedman

#did #drinking #guinness #i #swallow