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Jon Stewart

Read through the most famous quotes from Jon Stewart




Yes, reason has been a part of organized religion, ever since two nudists took dietary advice from a talking snake.


— Jon Stewart


#religion #humor

Religion. It's given people hope in a world torn apart by religion.


— Jon Stewart


#organized-religion #paradox #religion #hope

I've been to Canada, and I've always gotten the impression that I could take the country over in about two days.


— Jon Stewart


#always #been #canada #could #country

I celebrated Thanksgiving in an old-fashioned way. I invited everyone in my neighborhood to my house, we had an enormous feast, and then I killed them and took their land.


— Jon Stewart


#celebrated #enormous #everyone #feast #had

You have to remember one thing about the will of the people: it wasn't that long ago that we were swept away by the Macarena.


— Jon Stewart


#government #humor #politics #public-opinion #humor

If America leads a blessed life, then why did God put all of our oil under people who hate us?


— Jon Stewart


#good-questions #life

I was born with an adult head and a tiny body. Like a 'Peanuts' character.


— Jon Stewart


#body #born #character #head #i

Get there early because hope does not park your mother-fucking car.


— Jon Stewart


#obama #parking #humor

By the way, when you finish the bottle of Crown Royal, you can still use the pouch to hold your broken dreams.


— Jon Stewart


#dreams

To have not shot his friend in the face would have sent a message to the quail that America is weak.


— Jon Stewart


#humor






About Jon Stewart

Jon Stewart Quotes




Did you know about Jon Stewart?

during its decline and Stewart's show inherited such early morning time slots in many cities. So I shouldn't have said that and I did. Their second child a daughter Maggie Rose Stewart was born in February 2006.

He is the co-author of America (The Book): A Citizen's Guide to Democracy Inaction which was one of the best-selling books in the U. S. He has also had several film roles as an actor.

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