George Lopez

We are now the proud owners of a white boy. Now we have to shop in the caucasian isle and get sunscreen, mayonaise and mild salsa because the other ones really hawt! ↗

— George Lopez

#humor

Eh, Whappaaaa! ↗

— George Lopez

#funny

if you make waffles, throw out the first one. ↗

— George Lopez

#humor

When things are bad, it's the best time to reinvent yourself. ↗

— George Lopez

#best #best time #reinvent #things #time

David Letterman is the best late-night talk show host right now, hands down, and has been since he first took the desk. ↗

— George Lopez

#best #david #david letterman #desk #down

I believe that there are certain things that could be taken care of that you don't need a strong political background in. ↗

— George Lopez

#believe #care #certain #certain things #could

I can't pay her back, but what I can do is make her as happy as she thought I would when we first got married. ↗

— George Lopez

#first #got #happy #her #i

I didn't come from a background where I saw a lot of loving couples. All my aunts and uncles were either split up or fighting all the time. The only healthy relationships I saw were on TV. ↗

— George Lopez

#background #come #couples #either #fighting

I didn't want to be nobody, and that was the only way I could be somebody was to do stand-up. ↗

— George Lopez

#i #nobody #only #somebody #stand-up

Whoever is my relative, I will not be nice to them. ↗

— George Lopez

#be nice #i #nice #relative #them