Ellen DeGeneres

My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She's ninety-seven now, and we don't know where the heck she is. ↗

— Ellen DeGeneres

#exercise #family #grandmothers #grandparents #humor

You know, it's hard work to write a book. I can't tell you how many times I really get going on an idea, then my quill breaks. Or I spill ink all over my writing tunic. ↗

— Ellen DeGeneres

#writing #funny

I ask people why they have deer heads on their walls. They always say because it's such a beautiful animal. There you go. I think my mother is attractive, but I have photographs of her. ↗

— Ellen DeGeneres

#always #animal #ask #attractive #beautiful

Procrastinate now, don't put it off. ↗

— Ellen DeGeneres

#paradox #procrastination #humor

Sometimes you can't see yourself clearly until you see yourself through the eyes of others. ↗

— Ellen DeGeneres

#eyes #others #see #sometimes #through

You should never assume. You know what happens when you assume. You make an ass out of you and me because that's how it's spelled. ↗

— Ellen DeGeneres

#inspirational #humor

Life is short. If you doubt me, ask a butterfly. Their average life span is a mere five to fourteen days. ↗

— Ellen DeGeneres

#humor #inspirational #funny

Accept who you are. Unless you're a serial killer. ↗

— Ellen DeGeneres

#funny

I'm a godmother, that's a great thing to be, a godmother. She calls me god for short, that's cute, I taught her that. ↗

— Ellen DeGeneres

#godmothers #humor #lol #funny

Beauty is about being comfortable in your own skin. It's about knowing and accepting who you are. ↗

— Ellen DeGeneres

#beauty #inspirational #true-beauty #beauty