Craig Ferguson

Dr. Jeckyll & Mr. Hyde is a metaphor for alcoholism. He drinks a potion, becomes a monster. I know exactly how he feels. ↗

— Craig Ferguson

#metaphor

Divorce lawyers stoke anger and fear in their clients, knowing that as long as the conflicts remain unresolved the revenue stream will keep flowing. ↗

— Craig Ferguson

#divorce #divorce-lawyers #fear #lawyers #money

You clap. The Censor wakes up. We all get into trouble. ↗

— Craig Ferguson

#censorship #censorship

Sometimes people think you’re smart if you question the status quo, if nothing else. ↗

— Craig Ferguson

#misconceptions #status-quo #intelligence

I have that hypocrisy of a parent in that I'm like,'Come on, you've got to toughen up at the same time let me take care of that for you. ↗

— Craig Ferguson

#parenthood #hypocrisy

You can never talk religion on network TV. It makes too many people angry. You can talk about sex. ↗

— Craig Ferguson

#comedy #religion #sex #tv #religion

I do love America. And LA is a very short commute to America its like half an hour on the plane. ↗

— Craig Ferguson

#america #los-angeles #love

People talk to old people like they're children.'Oh you're very old aren't you?' Yeah I'm old. I'm not stupid. ↗

— Craig Ferguson

#condescension #wisdom #age

Laughter separates us from despair, and gives us a chance at love. ↗

— Craig Ferguson

#love #love

Oh Satan you're a wily one. ↗

— Craig Ferguson

#intelligence #satan #intelligence