Bill Maher

I do think the patriotic thing to do is to critique my country. How else do you make a country better but by pointing out its flaws? ↗

— Bill Maher

#better #country #critique #else #flaws

Jim Bakker spells his name with two k's because three would be too obvious. ↗

— Bill Maher

#because #his #jim #jim bakker #name

The country has become much more conservative, partly because it's been taken over by the religious right. ↗

— Bill Maher

#become #been #conservative #country #more

They're talking about banning cigarette smoking now in any place that's used by ten or more people in a week, which, I guess, means that Madonna can't even smoke in bed. ↗

— Bill Maher

#any #banning #bed #cigarette #cigarette smoking

This is a ridiculous heat wave we're in right now, and to contribute, Newt Gingrich said that for the entire month of June, he will stop blowing hot air. ↗

— Bill Maher

#blowing #contribute #entire #gingrich #heat

It's all been satirized for your protection. ↗

— Bill Maher

#protection #your

Clinton left the White House with all the class of an XFL halftime show. ↗

— Bill Maher

#clinton #halftime #house #left #show

Hi, I'm Bill. I'm a birth survivor. ↗

— Bill Maher

#birth #hi #i #survivor

I never thought I'd say this, what Obama needs in his personality is a little George Bush. ↗

— Bill Maher

#george #george bush #his #i #little

Suicide is man's way of telling God, "You can't fire me - I quit." ↗

— Bill Maher

#fire #god #i #i quit #man