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I live in a multi story building with many foreign families and a lot of them have some kind of trouble with the police, distrainors, lawyers and other creditors. When I'm at home, I often hear that there's someone who keeps ringing the door bell, to talk to one of those families. Apart from me, almost no one of these people work, they are sitting at home all day and watch TV and therefore they know who's standing in front of the door and therefore don't open it. But I'm a helpful person so I let them in by pressing the buzzer for the front door down stairs. It's funny to watch the police while they are trying to get entrance to the flat.
#building #foreign #families #funny #police #lawyers #confession
I try to make my boyfriend angry because he said proudly announced once that no one and nothing can make him upset.
It's my new challenge to show him otherwise. :-)
#angry #boyfriend #upset #challenge #proud #funny #confession
I killed my hamster when I was 14. I got a drum set for christmas and me and some friends wanted to start a band. One day, my parents were at work and my friends came over to our first band rehearsal. After a while, we tought it would be a funny idea to find out what would happen if we put the hamster into one of the drums. We did and I played some tones on it. We heard him squeaking and trembling but we tought it was great fun.
After another short play, I got him out. He was already dead - heart attack or something.
I am very sorry. I confess that I was a stupid young teenager.
#hamster #drums #funny #teenager #confession #panic #heart #sin
I want to do a preventive penance. I promise to everyone who will get near my car to hurt, damage or destroy her, that I will kill him or her.
I am not a violent person but I won't let anything happen to my baby.
When it comes to my car, it's not funny anymore!
My girlfriend and I (m/30) have been together for around 10 years now. Her family is originally from Russia. Shortly, after we got together, she invited me to her birthday party with her family. Up until then, I never met her family or knew much about them. Of course I agreed to come and got her a nice present and some flowers for her mother. I actually thought that it would be a small and quiet celebration.
Oh boy, was I wrong.
When we pulled up to her parents' house, I was overwhelmed. It was (still is) a really big house with fine decour and everything. I got rather nervous that her family would not like me as they obviously were playing in another league than me.
So, it was a huge party and all her family from all around the country and from Russia came to celebrate. And as you might know, the Russians love their vodka. Everyone was very kind and everyone wanted to drink with me. As soon as my glass was empty, another relative came my way holding vodka shots. My girlfriend was very busy talking to everyone and did not notice what happened until it was too late.
So, we danced, we took shots, the food was amazing. Until I noticed that I wasn't feeling so well. I didn't make it back to the bathroom, but puked all over myself, the floor and some landed on my girlfriend's mother... I was mortified!
Somehow, my girlfriend, her mother and her aunt managed to get me into the bathtub and hosed me down. They got me a pyjama of my girlfriend's dad and they put me to bed.
The next morning when I woke up I felt horrible. I was utterly ashamed, but still went down for breakfast. Everyone still present was smirking and laughing at me, but it seemed everything in good fun. Her mother came up to me with a bottle of vodka shortly after and asked if I wanted to do some shots. I almost puked on her again.
So I guess I just wanted to get this off my chest before our wedding in June when I have to see her whole family again.
#girlfriend #russian #vodka #drunk #puked #embarrassing #family #celebration #party #bathroom #funny #ashamed #confession #wedding #russia
I enjoy the sorrow, misery and pain of others. It does not have to be anything crass, but I get giddy and really really gleeful if I watch someone struggling.
I ROARED with laughter when I watched a young mother lose her baby's pacifier in a drainpipe and the baby started crying.
When I am walking through town and occasionally stop and watch, hoping for something funny to happen - I love watching people struggling with heavy objects.
I love watching fail compilations on YouTube.
Unfortunately, I now read on the internet that this glee and joy for the pain of others might be connected to feelings of inferiority.
I confess that I worry that should be ashamed for my key source of joy in my life. And that I love my fellow human beings the most when they are stuck in a water slide.
#funny #despair #joy #glee #youtube #videos #fun #laughing #baby #mother #slide #water #confession #inferiority
Today, I had to go to see a gynaecologist but before I went there, I washed myself 'down there' with a washrag which was lying around in the bathroom. Because I was already late I just whipped over and rushed to the my doctor. After a while, I was finally sitting on 'the chair' (ladies, you know what I am talking about) and the gynaecologist started laughing really really bad. Under laughter he tried to tell me something, after a while I was finally able to understand him. He told me that he hadn't needed to 'style' my vagina for him. I looked down and saw that it was covered in glitter.
I accidentally used the cloth my little daughter uses for painting and stuff...
Every time I am bored I go to my local music shop and switch all the CDs and DVDs into other packagings.
Every time my sister is bitchy or annoying, I spit on her pillow.
It satisfies me to know that she sleeps on that pillow without knowing anything.
I have an interest to go online and look at pictures of dead people. Then I like to laugh at them. The dead bodies dont disterb me, even when their organs or blood is exposed. I'm not sorry holocaust victims and dead people but I guess I should be...
When I was 16 I slept at my best friends house and we watched Babestation on his TV in his room. Being horny teenagers we found ourselves, sat next to each other on his bed, wanking.
Being curious about touching another guys dick, I asked if I could touch him. He agreed and for a while we wanked each other, which I quite enjoyed.
Anyway long story short, he finished before me and kinda lost control of where it landed. Since I was sat next to him some landed on my leg and arm which I was pretty surprised about but it was hot. In fact, it actually helped me cum. But that's a secret. As revenge, I came over his bed. He wasn't impressed.
We cleaned up and went to sleep. We joke about it from time to time, but it nothing has happened since.
I pulled a rather nasty joke on my brother...
Recently the temperature's have falling quite a bit where I live. At night, we have sub zero temperatures.
My brother was at his girlfriend's house for the last few days, so me and a friend of mine decided to prank him.
He has a big waterbed in his room and he always likes to tell me that he loves his bed more than me.
So, we decided to open all 3 windows in his room and turn off the radiator.
As I said, it gets really fucking cold at night. He was gone for two more days and when he came home, he found one big bloc of ice in his room aka his former bed.
I am sorry bro that you had to sleep on the couch for 4 days straight until your bed has thawed.
At the birthday party of my little sister (it was her 7th birthday) I put vodka into the bowle so the kids get funnier.
#alcohol #vodka #birthday #party #sister #bowle #kids #funny
Is anyone fart in ur tuition class or burp😂 I have done I think this is embarrassing don’t uh?
#embarresed #funny #lol
I read every confession on this site. I should be working right now but I don't want to, it's just too damn funny.
#confession #work #funny #lazy
Back in the 5th grade, us guys goofed around and cut off the long hair of the girls. At that time, we really thought this would be funny. Now when I think about it ( I am 16 now ) it's not fun at all. Sorry girls, I didn't mean to!
Hi! I'd like to confess I work in a pizzeria and there's some wit who thinks he can order pizza almost every day around 11 pm. Because we also want to finish, we always put the grossest cheese on the pizza and sometimes he also gets our "special sauce"
I am only able to fulfill my manly act if my girlfriend calls me "the machine".
#machine #manly #act #funny #confession
My friends and I love to crash house parties and there are A LOT where we live. We usually get quite hammered and dick around - it is always great fun. I also usually ends with one of most of us puking and throwing up. When I do, I like to do it on the carpet(s). When I am done, I turn them around, so it will not be noticed at first.
It is hilarious to watch when the host(s) notices and I when they have to clean it up afterwards.
#party #puking #alcohol #wasted #carpet #host #confession #funny
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