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Honestly, I don’t know what’s wrong with me, I’m a religious person and sometimes when I really think about IT I can struggle with night mares, and depression for weeks, but I love sex, the problem it’s like normal sex left me empty, I don’t know why I have those sadic fantasy’s like, something I stared thinking since I was like 17 was let someone fuck me while other people can see me, and show that to people how good I feel, also the idea of them watching me will make me 100 times more horny, other fantasy is being fucked by different guys, in the same time, and let them touch me all over my body I have the fantasy to feel more than 6 hands pleasing me in the same time, those fantasies are tooo dirty for the life I have, I don’t know what to do :m(
I am not sure how to go about this. I have seen patterns of events everywhere I have been. Since past few years friends and colleagues have asked me questions (although in a very calm manner) about many personal and not so personal things of which I have no idea about. Later I have ended up something bad happening to me about the thing I talked to them about. Very bad politics in office. I read on the internet that it is a part of gangstalking. I don't know if that is a reality.
I'm 53, male, and married now for nearly 30 years. No children.
I grew up in a strict religious home. Sex was reserved for married people and I still believe this to this day. I had in my teens what I would consider with my limited experience, a normal libido. Erections with the slightest stimulation: vibration of the school bus, brushing up against a girl, bikini clad tv characters, and all manner of stimulus, and I would have a raging hardon. By 13 or 14, I can't remember, I started masturbating in the shower initially. It gradually increased in frequency all through my teens and early 20s until I finally got married at 23. We were both virgins and very naive. I knew before I married my wife that she had been physically and emotionally abused by her step father who, by the way, was only 12 years older than her. He never raped her, but fondled her breasts and made advances towards her. He even bored a hole through the bathroom wall to spy on her and her sisters. When they discovered the peep hole, they plugged it as best they could and told their mother, but if fell on deaf ears. She couldn't believe he would do such a thing. He did worse to the other 2 girls than my wife, but apparently she was affected more than her sisters.
After we were married for a year, what little sex there was in the marriage ended abruptly. Penetration became painful for her and after many doctors visits, the diagnosis was vulvar vestibulitis. We tried all manner of "cures" for years. Spent thousands of dollars on attempts to "fix" her problems. To no avail. I gradually returned to my old habits and eventually added porn to the addiction. Work, public restrooms, driving down the road in my car, were all opportunities to jackoff. She didn't work much, just the odd part-time job here and there, so I had little to no time at home alone, so I masturbated whenever I had the opportunity.
Over the years, I had a couple opportunities to be unfaithful with other women. About 5 years into our marriage my wife was out of town for about 3 months taking care of her grandfather. Her younger sister and her daughter were moving across several states. Their route took them through our area, so they decided to stop at my house and stay the night before continuing their move. My grandmother lived next door to me, so I stayed with her while my sister-in-law and her daughter stayed at my house. This was all with my wife's knowledge. I had the perfect opportunity to have sex with her and no one would have known. After she left, I masturbated what felt like non-stop for days thinking of her. She has the best looking ass of the 3 sisters. She's also the only physically fit of the 3. How I wanted to fuck the hell out of her before she left. As she was backing out of the drive to leave, I noticed she left something in the bedroom. Some piece of clothing or something. I ran outside and flagged her down. When I handed her the object, whatever it was, she had a somewhat puzzled look on her face. Did she want me to invite her back inside? I don't know, but I had my suspicions. She told my wife years later that I was a better man than my wife knew. We both looked at each other and had that look of acknowledgement. During the same time period, my aunt, who lived across the road from me took in a renter. She was gorgeous! Auburn hair, killer body, beautiful face and wild as they come. I never made a move. Next came my wife's best friend. This was the closest I ever came to cheating physically. She moved in with us, but we were very careful about never being together without my wife around. I came home once to find my wife gone and her friend was laying out in the sun right outside my bedroom window. I watched her from the window and jacked off, more than once, don't remember. To this day, I still think she chose that spot intentionally to tease me. She fained a muscle cramp once to try to get me to give her a massage. I resisted. I watched her drive out of our driveway when she left later that same day only to see here angrily cussing and shaking her head. She eventually got married and moved out. I traveled for work for about a decade. Never took advantage of the opportunity. Always looking, but never touched another woman. I just never got up the courage to cross the line.
When my wife turned 43, a "miracle" happened. Her pain went away and we enjoyed about 5 years of what I believe was a normal sex life. We had intercourse 3 or 4 sometimes more times a week. Then just as quickly as it came, it went away. The pain was back and then she had a nervous breakdown. Can't work, won't leave the house except for doctors visits, sits on the couch and watches tv and plays video games. She's 52.
Should I have left 25 years ago? Sometimes I think so. I went right back to jacking off and the porn obsession has gotten worse. It takes more and more deviant videos to get me off. How I wish I could go back in time. Would I still marry this woman? I really don't know. I just feel worthless, angry, frustrated, and hopeless. I feel as though my life has been a waste as far as my marriage goes. Neither one of us is happy, but it's not for lack of trying. I hope one day this all ends up being worthwhile.
#frustrated #horney #regret #guilty #conscience #sisterinlaw #bestfriend
I confess I don’t know how to talk to girls.
#lonely #frustrated #mad #bored #sex #judgemental #been #a #while #stupid #ex
I'm in love with my best friend, but she has a boyfriend and is in love with another boy. He keeps complaining that he will never have her because she has a boyfriend. I think it's unfair he gets to complain. They will eventually break up, but I can't change my gender or her sexual orientation.
#lesbian #jealous #scared #frustrated #love
14 years old (f)
Ever since middle school people guys in general ask if I'm a lesbian or bisexual. I always said no because I never really questioned my sexuality from all my mom has taught me about liking boys and only boys. The boys that knew me well questioned me not just acquaintances, mostly the guys who I hung out with on a daily basis. In 7th I got really close with a girl we hung out everyday invited eachother to family dinners and everyday we hungout at school and walked home afterschool. Sometimes afterschool we would hold hands just for fun. Me at the time was dating a guy. Which without him me and her would of never met. Around that time I took therapy for my "depression" and family issues. At had it after school once a week. Everyday after school me and her would go to a fast food restaurant everyday just to hang out and eat if we had money. One day I totally forgot I had therapy and my mom told me to hurry up, me and her didnt walk alone we walked with a group of around 3 boys. I had to rush but she went to the bathroom so I ditched her. Ever since then she was mad. Then in 8th in the beginning of the year we became friends again but not bestfriends like it use to be. 2 months later she moved to another city. I was really sad I cried for her for not forgiving me, loosing her as a friend, and alot more. I had really bad grades in 7th and 8th grade that put me at risk of graduating so I decided to go to another school with only a limit of 15 students so they could help me out. 3 months later in half of the school year she came back to my old school. I was really happy because that meant I might see her again. We started texting ever since she moved and she finally forgave me but was devastated that I moved schools. We are going to the same high school and I'm really excited. I hope things can be the same again. We are slowly talking like we used to again. I told her about my bisexuality and that she is the same so that gave me hope but then she stopped talking to me less ever since she got with a guy or idk what they are but they are talking and now Im trying to talk to her more and I think she is single again. I have catched feelings for her and I'm scared to tell her because I don't want to loose our friendship if we date.
I am an exhibitionist that is sexually active and about to turn 15. I found sex at an early age. My parents noticed and although they didn't give me a dildo, they did teach me it was ok as long as I kept it private. Without their knowledge, I now have a boyfriend and cannot get enough, and it is next to impossible to keep it private. Confession stories don't tell me how to keep it a secret and they don't tell me how to go about being a star, but the stories can make me horny and give me ideas. I want to read about what it takes to be a porn star. I love that I could get paid for what I live for, showing my body and doing sex. So how to get in this profession? I search and no instructions.
#frustrated #porn #sex #secret #private #horny #famous #profession
My ex-wife was lazy and didn't like to work, she only held jobs for a short time and didn't had one for a couple of years. It's was so frustrating to go work my as off so she can hang out all day. We are divorced now but before that happened we were fighting one night and I got so mad with her sponging off me I stripped her naked, grabbed all her other clothes, told her I bought them so they were mine. I kept her naked for days before I gave her clothes back.
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