No subscription or hidden extras
Read the best #depression confession stories
In 2018 when I was 13 I met someone on discord. We were really close that we knew everything about each other. One day in the middle of the night she told me that I was a slut and a whore for texting her boyfriend even tho I'm lesbian. And told me that I'm just a fat fucking loser and I should die for what I did. Days after that she messaged me again saying she was sorry and wants to be friends again. I forgave her cause I didn't want her to yell at me again. Weeks later she messaged again saying she wants to end her life and asked for my help. I tried helping her....I tried. For a week I was trying to help her by giving her the hotline number, professionals to talk to, websites she can go to for help but she said no for each one. Then the last day I talked to her she told me that I cant never help her and that I was still a slut and whore. That I need to die with her too. Then she just stopped texting me. All her friends blocked me when she disappeared. At the time I didn't even know if she even did it. I'm 16 now and her ex-boyfriend messaged me weeks ago saying that she was alive and just wanted me to kill myself for a dare......now she haunts me in my dreams. I have depression cause of her, anxiety cause of her.....everything cause of her.
#depression #sad #discord
Oh you guys do NOT understand how much I hate this fucking shit life. Gosh people annoy me so fucking much, plus I’ve got no friends. UGHHJJ I fucking hate it, you guys just don’t understand words can’t explain how much I hate life NO WORDS. The only good about life is food nothing else. UGHHHHH and I’m not going to kill myself because I still wanna eat, but that’s about all that’s hkeeping me going
There's day when I feel 100% and days like today when I want to end it all... I don't know why it's like this or why I tend to get this way but I wish he knew I needed him.
#lonely #hurt #depression
I’ve been in therapy my whole life and I just wanna end all this pain and suffering. It’s so hard to get going and continue to live day by day by day.
I just can’t deal with all of this anymore.
I really just wanna end it all - i’m so done with everything
The last few months I've been working out and trying to get skinny. I can't even look myself in the mirror without crying.
Life is nothing but a series of endless financial losses until you eventually kill yourself. I was finally starting to make some decent money for once fml..
I often contemplate divorce, I love my wife but I have not been happy for years and I keep convincing myself things will get better but I'm starting to get the the point where I dont care anymore.
I like to be alone. Or don't I? Do I actually despise it? Do I crave more human interaction and just deny myself of that fact? I think of myself as quite the lone wolf. And I thought I'm fine with that.. Realisation hits now.. It's hitting me hard. Slapping the fact in my face that I've never been able to keep the people in my life that I wanted to keep in it. I hide the fact that I'm quite toxic, or can be quite toxic, behind telling myself and others that I'm an ideal lone wolf.. And that I'm okay with it. But am I? I don't know that for a fact. I guess I'm not. I like to think of myself as an introverted empath. Maybe I'm an extroverted, choleric aashole in reality..
I came out of a long and dark period of my life, finally on the up and happy. About 7-8 months back i changed jobs to what i now wanna make my career, i also met an amazing person there. I would consider her a good friend who helped me thru some stuff and helped me think things thru differently. Shes everything i ever dreamed of in a woman, smart, funny, aggressive, and down to earth. Most of all she made me feel cared about and that i matter to someone. I thought she would feel the same since we both went thru similar horrors and horrible things and because we get along so well. A month ago i confessed i liked her and she rejected me without a hesitation. Im not upset about that or really hurt.. just bummed. I started to sit back and look at it differently. Shes a one sided friend who really is only concerned about herself and actually doesnt care what im going thru as long as im there to listen to her problems. I come home to a mom who destroyed my family, up to my head in debt, dont have any friends or social skills, and my only best friend decided to walk out of my life 2 months back. Theres more but why would i bore you, picture painted that im isolated from the world living a horrible life. I thought i was happy, i thought i finally got out from the sadness, finally found a friend who genuinely cared about me..
i feel like I don’t belong to this world, i dont think about killing myself but i do think about how much no one would miss me if i did just drop dead. That i would just be a passing thought once and never thought of or missed after. My depression has me gripped by the throat and im struggling
I’ve dealt with these feelings since i was 15(26 now), and i just wanna know what true happiness is, what true friendship is, what true love is. Im tired of being tired, abused, lied to, and taken advantage of
I pray everyday just to feel the happiness i felt when i thought i beat this depression
#sad #depression #unhappy
I feel like I'm useless yet I don't have depression, I sometimes just wanna talk to my friends but I feel like they all hate me especially one person. I have to spend the next few days with her and I seriously think she hates me. God, I wanna die
I think having no one to talk to for like a year and a half has warped me. Now I’m going days and days without sleep. I think i leave comments because that’s my only human interaction. I type to myself.
But If no one wants to listen to me, or talk to me. And I’m confused and not sleeping, then no one wants to read my foolishness anyways. I’m going to try to just stop unless it’s important. I doubt it last an hour.
when i was younger i found the love of my life but i was poor and everyone looked down on my family cause most of them really amounted to nothing so i never would do anything we loved each other held hands we were inseparable but i was scared i would ruin her life so i told her no every time it almost lead to something till i nearly cracked so i left and told her we could not see each other again i kno she still cares about me but its been years im married now have kids and love my wife but never as much as i still love her and i wonder as time goes on if i ever got a time machine i would go back and try to change it because my wife and i have had problems it has nothing to do with this other girl either i never cheated nothing like that but just normal problems expected from my past and hers but i keep thinking i would tell myself if you were with her it might have been different maybe you wouldnt have fucked up that bad so i would end up trying but then if i did and no matter how hard i tried i still ended up ruining her life and then i would definitely go back and try to change that to and i would end up in an endless loop of misery and that makes me sad it feels like im just faking now cause eveything in my life not just this and im just walking around pretending like im not meant for true happiness and the only thing i can do is make other people happy and i have been feeling like its starting to not matter to me anymore i dont feel anything anymore for making other people happy cause i know im just going to be miserable again any minute i get its depression but i thought of it and i really hate the social system we have in place and thats why i think there needs to be a real change instead of safe spaces
#depression #love #change #despair
I'm lonely. Well... all my friends make fun of me and don't realize I'm hurting. Everyone says I'm depressed but don't make an effort to help. My friend says I have depressed written on my forehead. And they push me around like I'm a little bitch. But when I get tired of it I make comments like 'i dont care' 'yeah sure' 'okay' and i mumble them then they stop. So sometimes I try and ignore them and just sit in the corner and not talk to anyone but I always manage to begin talking to them again because I'm just a social person with no friends. I have one good friend. What do I do?
I am always sad and want nothing to do with my school friends or friends that I have made through cheer. I used to be the person who was always doing something and never wanted to be home. I was constantly surrounded by people and friends. Ever since I started high school, that has all changed. I lost all of my close friends and no I find myself playing with my pets and doing nothing but going to practice. Its sad because I want to be back to my super social life and have all my friends back but everyone seems to hate me. I have thought about killing myself due to the amount of mean comments and things being said about my by people I thought were my friends. I am most certainly depressed but I don't want to talk to my parents about it because they are very abusive.
When I was 13 I would cut myself. Mostly, because I got bullied everyday for being gay. I tried killing myself 6 times. I would cut more then 7 times a day. It went on for about 6 months. Then I went to a treatment centre. I tried wearing shirts with short sleeves, but sometimes I can get really insecure about the scars on my arms. But I have fully recovered from self-harm. I survived. I got through it. I know how hard life can be. But just hold on for a little longer. It could change your life. Stay strong.
—Danny
I've been in deep depression for...well, it's been so long I forget. My family has now began to put it aside and I'm starting to be the neglected forgotten child in the house. My sister's kid has started to take my place. My father and I rarely talk anymore. Just the other day he refused to look at me once. The desire to just kill myself gets stronger every day. The pain of self harm starts to feel calming now. The pray that when I fall sleep, I never wake up. I keep a tab open of fastest ways to kill myself. I hate the fact I have to deal with this reality. I just want it to end....so bad. I've hurt myself to many times and no one has cared anymore. I've written so many suicide notes. I'm broken.
I have been with my girlfriend for about 4 and a half years now. We started dating when we were in high school (i was 16 and she was just about to turn 16 in a few months). I love her more than anything in the whole world. But ever since we started dating, i lost contact with all my closest friends, both male and female. She always finds problems with them. I have been loyal to her, i never once thought about cheating.
I used to be known by everyone in my batch and the younger people. And had not one enemy because i was always friendly and kind and outgoing with people. And because of that, i was popular with people, even the teachers lived me even though im mischievous in class and school. Fuck it, even the principal knew me. Both me and my big brother who was graduated by then. I had a really good reputation and it’s not because i tried to, its because I genuinely was kind and caring while also being fun and mischievous and athletic! (I understand that i wasnt the smartest kid around). Where as my gf was mostly surrounded by 3 toxic friends who equally lacked the social skills but was feeding negative and toxic things into her mind. My girl is smart and beautiful and extremely talented in sports as well! But those friends of hers were lazy at studies, tries to act like they’re it and like they are princesses who know exactly how people are when they are just protected children who hasn’t interacted with people! (They genuinely thought that life always goes as it is in movies). They brought down her grades massively and were hiding behind my girl while she does the dirty work guided by the things they put into her mind. They are also to blame for her starting to think I’m cheating on her with other girls or doing things behind her back. My girlfriend also lacks the ability to empathize and understand people at all. I partly blame the fact that she has almost never been exposed to interacting with public and was always protected by her family. But she deeply cares and tries to protect the people closest to her. Hence, the reason she did the dirty work of those toxic friends of hers.
She told me to stop hanging out with the guys who always had my back, who have helped me even in the little things, the guys i used to have friendly rivalries in sports and gaming. They were my brothers and people who i have even considered to be my bestmen when i marry. And she knew that. But she made me to stop hanging out with them. For the littlest things, for inability to understand how boys are. Obviously boys act differently towards each other. That’s what friends are. Thats what makes us G’s. Some of my friends did warn me about her, that she and those 3 friends of hers have a bit of a bad reputation. But they all were really open to my feelings and genuinely gave her a chance and we’re friendly to her. I just wish she was the same. They were happy for me and didn’t want to do anything that would hurt my relationship badly. But when they saw that she just won’t stop with the misunderstanding and trying to push me away, they tried to do their best to pull me closer too. But none of them tried to force me out of the relationship, they all adviced me though. That i have 3 choices, fix the relationship and make her have a change of heart so i can hangout with my friends, break up with her, or let go of them. I obviously decided option 1. But sadly it didn’t work.
And from girls, there was one girl in my friend group that she hated for some little reasons. But i know if she actually tried to, they could have been really close. She was in a different class and some girls in my class were pretty popular as well. And as I mentioned, i was really close with my friends girls too. But i always kept my girlfriend above them. Even so, my girlfriend wanted me to completely stop talking to that girl she hates and she wanted me to be rude to her and hate her too. I obviously can’t do that, a bond i have cannot be just broken and turned into hate. I tried to fix the problem there and remove that hate as well. I wanted my girlfriend to see that the problem that’s there between them is a simple thing that can be fixed. But her pride and ego is too massive for her to let go. She pretended to try but didn’t put even 1% of effort in it. I gave as much effort as i can with her friends... but she didn’t. I never told her to stop talking to her friends. NEVER. I only advised her of the things I felt, and i asked her to think about it herself, she let them go only when they told her that she spends time with me more than them which is not true at all, they know it and she knows it... every person who knows about our relationship knew it’s a stupid reason to start treating her differently. So she let them go... so coming back to my story... this hate towards her the spread like a flame to the other girl in my class, which those toxic friends of hers had a massive role in. How am I supposed to stop completely talking to people in my own classroom? How am I supposed to let go of friends girl or boys who i have created a memories and strong bonds? They all tried to befriend my gf but she doesn’t try at all! In the end my teacher found out about relationship and advised me about it too but i was so blinded by love that i never listened to anyone! So i lost contact with my friends both girls and boys! We went to college where some of my closest friends went to, by then my girl did let me talk to them, but it’s as if we were acquaintances and not friends. And she still continued to judge people.
She even started these things with my family! I don’t think there is a single member in my family she hasn’t had an issue with! Even my baby cousin who just turned 4! My mother and father and brother too! Every single person! She tried to make me stay home when we planned family trips which we rarely ever get to go! But she goes on more than 20 trips a year! She doesn’t let me have time with my family bc i have to text her or call her! She blames me for her having a bad life in high school! She blames me for having a bad time in college! And now she’s having a bad time in uni. She acts as her and her family are the perfect people! And i have changed a lot! I was the most patient man you would ever meet... and i am patient towards people who aren’t my family. But I get upset quickly towards her and my family now. I dont have much fun memories in high school and at home, we’re at uni in a different country, most of my friends who were close to me dont know where i am no. I dont have social media other than one chatting app bc she made me delete them, i only have a few contacts saved on my phone. And recently when she gets angry she gets a bit physical. And she says i have changed a lot. But she never tried to understand why i have changed. She says that you only need 2 or 3 close friends. But the friends “we” have are choices of her own. She gets in the way of my decisions, where she thinks her advise is better than my own mothers. To avoid fights in my relationship and to stop a fight where she says i always choose others over her or where she says that i never take her side and say my family is always right, i follow her advise. And some of those have come back to haunt me. I sometimes think back to when i used to have fun with my friends. Or when i have fun with my family. It’s so sad, if she stopped her attitude, made the relationship we have more important to her than her pride and ego, thought of my family as her own and treated it equally, and just listen to me and trust my decisions as a man, we could make this work. She sometimes understands that she has an issue with anger. But that’s it. She says that her rude attitude is actually her being a genuine and real person. Which is bullshit. There is a line between being true and being rude which she doesn’t see. She says that she has an attitude and if i dont like it i can leave which she know that if i wanted to leave i would have gone a long time ago, she blames me for people thinking badly of her when I really tried and people really tried (and there are instances where I actually had some fake friends who were rude to her, i stood up for her and took her side. Which she doesn’t appreciate).
And I’m not an angel. I never said i was perfect, i was never said I haven’t done wrong. I have lied to her about things. But all of those lies were to hangout with my friends, or because I know she’ll freak out if i tell her, to avoid unnecessary arguments, to stop arguments. But i dont have friends to go hangout with anymore or play some games or anything. I still have to hide some little details about anything regarding females. Even if i said i had a casual conversation with a girl, I would end up in a fight. It has reduced though, she understands a bit more now. But with this rate of growth, i would be old and dead by the time she understands.
But I know she cares and loves me, she made a huge decision of giving up her medicine degree to do it later just because I couldn’t get in at the time as well. She helped me with my studies, she has stood up for me even to lecturers when i have been treated unfairly, sometimes secretly and sometimes without listening to me, because she knows that I’m too forgiving to people and too kind to people and sometimes they abuse that about me. She has made sure and advised me to not let people walk all over me just because I’m too kind and forgiving and i know if I’m hurt or injured she’ll put away everything to come for me... I truly do lover her... i couldn’t stand to leave her, i want her and need her but I just want her to understand me, who I am and what i need. I always try my best to keep her happy. I don’t want to leave her.
WHAT SHOULD I DO?!
#relationship #toxic #advise #depression #sadness #needhelp #help #love #cheating #relationshipproblems
My best friend doesn't care about me, my family doesn't love me and my boyfriends abusive. On top of that I'm suffering from depression, anxiety, bpd, ptsd and psychosis.
It's just not worth it anymore lol
About a month ago, I had a miscarage. I’ve only told my parents and husband about it and they’ve asked me if I was okay. I keep telling them I am and to not say anything to anyone else because it won’t change anything. But the truth is I was never okay to start with and i cry whenever I’m alone and no one can see it.
I did so many wrong choices... i was drunk cuz i got kicked from school few weeks ago.. and my dumb ass went home alone, in dark clothes and i saw car... i was so scared but he saw me... well until i realized he went straight into tree.. i was the cause of the accident... i mean noone got killed but still i feel like shit for that... got no charges however, still dont know how...
#depression #accident #car #unwell #choices #confession
Confessions by confessionstories.org
