Content Confessions

I paint in illusions. I spin stories and tales to inspire or teach. A truth hidden in everyone. I go after the lost. Those no one else seeks to reach. Mostly i did it in the real world once when it could tolerate me. Then i stopped. A pandemic hit so i woke up & gave it a try in a new way for me. Who knows if you ever really help. But its better to try to help than to do nothing. Or so i thought. But being in my last embers i dont think I’ve actually helped. I thought i was helping. But I think being near death so much muddled my attempts. So maybe its time i go back to sleep. Ill have to think on that. Might be time to wrap up my musings. Quit failing as i try to assist. Leave it to those better suited. Go back to being happy.

When one journey ends, the next begins. Lets make this a happy tale.

:-)

#happy   #love   #solitude   #content   #completion   #complete   #whole  

Well I don't have the right category I wanted but just wanna share this.

I am a Filipino girl at around 14 years old. I just confessed my feelings to my friend a few hours ago.

I will hide my name as "Anon" and her name as "Asuna"

I met her last November. Me and my best friend always go home from school together with her squad. And because we always do that after school, I met Princess. That time I had no feelings for her. But she was always so kind to me, and I don't put any meaning to it, until this year, February 22, she hugged me for around 15 minutes, maybe a friendly hug but it was so tight and after that, she acted strangely, she has a marker stain in her face and she asked me to remove it, because her friend volunteered to remove it, but she refused so and chose me to remove it instead. After that, I knew my feelings toward her was real, so, I suddenly had a crush on her, at first. At this month april 15, we went to my best friend's older sister's party and she was invited. We were only few that time. When we are walking on our way home, it was only Asuna and me. We walked together but kept quiet. It was kinda awkward until she said that she will miss me, but yeah, I just said its ok bc I COULD NOT SAY THAT I WILL ALSO MISS HER. When she was at her destination I said goodbye and turned my back on her. Until she called my name, grabbed my arm and suddenly gave me a goodbye hug, like the ones in movies, even though we were in public, I just took the moment she hugged me for like 10 seconds and didn't mind the people looking at us, and she left me, confused on what she just did, and she ran to cross the road.

This day, we were on our way home, from our family trip. While we were on the car, I opened my messenger and I suddenly confessed my feelings to her. I said that she must not reply me, saying sorry bc she cant bring back my love for her or something like, so thanks to the feature in messenger, I just blocked her, because I had no choice, I know she's not a bisexual like me, well kinda. And here I am, writing this. I just, love her. I wanted her to feel the same way as much as I feel for her. But I will never know unless I unblock her, but I've already made some possible outcomes that she will just leave me in the "friend" zone. Help me :(((

#shy   #love   #bisexual   #romance   #confessions